I should have this tattooed on my body somewhere. It had been my hope that this time off would help me break this horrible habit but alas, I think it has only made it worse. Having more time only means I can push things off more and then I just panic.
Why do I stress myself out?
I have always found that the stress was a motivator. It makes me feel alive in a way that completing a task ahead of time never has. My best work has always been done right on the edge. Now that I have nothing quite so pressing, I am missing that tension in my gut, that feeling of motivation. I want to feel alive again.